May 4th 2021
Blowing $#!T Up is A-MAY-ZING!
Do y'all remember 2020, because we certainly do! Man, it started with a crazy pandemic and soon enough, you couldn't find toilet paper or hand sanitizer anywhere, everyone suddenly had 4,000 masks on their faces, and there were (6-feet apart, socially distanced) lines for EVE-RY-THING! You want water? LONG LINE! You need groceries!? LONGER LINE! You need to use the restroom!?! Well, first you'd have to fight someone for toilet paper first, and then: LONGEST LINE EVER!!!!
So this year, in order to Blow $#!T Up properly and enjoy an A-MAY-ZING spring, we wanted to let you all in on some inside scoop that we learned the hard way: make sure you shop now, and don't wait! Your favorite fireworks are going to sell out, and the longer you wait to get them, the longer you're gonna have to wait in line! And as we discussed above, no one likes lines. That means that now is the time to shop to your heart's content and get all your favorite fireworks before they're gone... because that WILL happen, and most likely, that will be soon!
With over 250+ items on sale, there is no time to waste!
So #Pyrosquad™, don't say we didn't warn ya: act now! Get your faves before they're gone and stock up for July 4th, all while saving yourself the trouble of waiting in lines! Also, we've got like 40,000 extra rolls of toilet paper if you want to buy some.
(Just kidding... kinda.)